We read all the books there were to read. And we built all the towers there were to build. And we bundled up and took a couple walks in the snow.
A bro- and sis-in-law, and their kids and grands rented a vacation home in central Oregon this past week. Dan and I offered to entertain our youngest great-niece so her parents could ski with the family.
We remember what it was like to have small children, and how lovely it was to get a break to do something alone with our respective spouses, or with other couples.
“It rekindles the relationship,” said my very wise husband. “It reminds them of how they were first attracted to each other.”
For that very reason, Dan and I maintain Friday date night (except, more often than not, it begins in the afternoon).
We have no paying jobs, or kids or pets at home. So really, it’s like we’re dating each other 24/7 as we hike and snowshoe and cook and do volunteer work and generally play together.
But there’s something special—maybe only to us women, I don’t know—about a designated time and place where the man has put some thought into the activity and the type of food.
One of my favorite recent dates was a walk along the river to a new food cart area. We chose the sampler plate from the pierogi cart. Dressed in layers and sitting at a picnic table in the winter sunshine—pierogi never tasted better.
There are two points to this blog … or maybe I’m just rambling and there’s no point at all. But this is what I want to say:
1. Go on dates. Date each other, and if you’re single, make memories with friends, siblings, kids and grandkids, cousins, grandparents.
Don’t ever stop dating your wife and don’t ever stop flirting with your husband. — Author unknown
2. Make dates possible for the people you care about. Offer to provide childcare. Or send a gift card that will allow for a date night. My oldest grandson and I had plans to have lunch together when I that sensed that my daughter—mom to six kids—could use this time away from the house. So I gave my ‘date’ away. “Here,” I said to my grandson, handing funds to him, “take your mom out to lunch.” It was just what my daughter needed.
It’s important to stay connected. To dream and plan together—uninterrupted—as husband and wife. To conduct heart-to-heart talks with the people who know and love us best. To be sensitive to the needs of others around us and make it possible for them to get away and refuel, if it’s within our capacity.
Our gift to my niece and her husband on that ski day last week turned out to be a gift to Dan and me. When all the skiers arrived home, we shared an evening meal together and gathered for one last family photo.
It’s only fair to warn you, though: If you hang out with an adorable toddler who keeps you entertained all day, there is the danger the next day of walking around, feeling as if something’s missing.
10 questions to ask your spouse on date night:
1. What would you do if you won the lottery?
2. What was your biggest fear as a child?
3. What is your biggest fear now?
4. What is your favorite memory of us dating?
5. What is one new hobby you’d like to try?
6. What are your Top Three all-time favorite movies?
7. What is your biggest pet peeve?
8. If you had one super power, what would it be?
9. What is one thing you’d like to accomplish in the next year?
10. What one thing do I do that makes you feel most loved?
*Edited from quotess.net